youth group | Permission to Peruse

Update on youth member

October 27th, 2007 at 3:10 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

If you remember from last fall, I was helping out a youth member that was having a particularly bad time. I was going to counseling sessions with her. It was getting so bad, at one point I thought I’d have to get her into drug treatment after she kept showing up half-high from overdosing on NyQuil. She was starting to hurt herself and it was just bad. But she has made a complete 180 in the past year. Her aunt and uncle have taken custody of her and they are just a fantastic couple with two other teenagers. They set her up in her own room, got her all new girly clothes, got her pedicures and haircuts and all kinds of stuff. She is absolutely thriving and it’s so good to see a smile on her face every time I see her. She’s really striving to be a good Christian and it’s wonderful to see how God has worked in this situation.

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Results of tonight’s meeting

October 26th, 2007 at 11:35 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

Can I just say that tonight was nothing short of miraculous? I mean, really. We had our youth council meeting tonight that I was literally crying over Wednesday because I was so nervous about it. Phone calls and emails and conversations were flying everywhere all week about it. But let me tell you, God was all over tonight and there was such a sweet spirit among us that I would have never guessed could happen.

Last night as I was praying about this, I just felt God calling us to be compassionate. I started looking up verses about compassion and I found this verse in Nehemiah 9:17 But you are a forgiving God, gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. and just felt it was what we needed….being gracious towards them, compassionate and slow to anger. And it happened tonight. All of our anger was gone. We were gracious and compassionate towards one another. We didn’t point fingers and slam each other for past wrongs. Yes, we did admit and talk about that things had gone wrong. We didn’t gloss over the fact we had issues. And I wouldn’t even say we started with a clean slate and forgot about the past. I think we built on the past. We realized where we had gotten and how but because we all looked to God to heal this, I think he changed our own hearts and not each other to see each other in a different light. I think we all just wanted to not put our differences aside but bring them to the front and deal with them.

I can honestly say I feel free walking out of that meeting. No sideward glances. No rolling eyes. No beating heart. No anger. No hurt. No distrust. Will it always be this way? Not if we work together long enough. But I really think we have realized if we get knocked down, we can get back up again. Just like Toby Mac talked about in that video I posted a few days ago. We’re going to disagree. Over and over and over again. But the true test of a friendship or team is can it make it past that? Somehow tonight we did.

Everyone could sense the tension was gone and we had a great time. We talked about the youth and laughed about who was dating who and shared who was struggling and then all of the sudden, we had something in common. The youth. That’s what we’re there for. To lead young people towards Christ and help them live that out. We all have a part and we need everyone.

I was dreading tonight but I know God worked a miracle in our hearts tonight. We do have a rocky past and that will never, ever change now but I can say for right now, we are united.

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Not a great day

October 24th, 2007 at 11:20 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

This afternoon particularly was rough for me. There’s been another meeting scheduled with our youth council for this Friday and I started completely stressing about it. By the time Scott got home right before 5, he found me in a pool of tears on our bed. Not a great welcoming back home. But I say that to say this. God answers prayers. I’ve been so hopeless with our situation and all of the leaders being able to get along and I just have been begging God to show us the right thing to do. I don’t know if I have my permanent answer but for today, right now, a weight was lifted off. I don’t feel the anger, stress and worry that I felt this afternoon and it is many thanks to our pastor that showed this video during his guest-speaking sermon tonight in youth group. But more than that, many thanks to God for giving me what I needed when I needed it. I have no idea what Friday will bring but at least I’m going into it with the proper attitude.

If you know anything about Contemporary Christian music in the past 15 years or so, I’m sure you’ve heard of dc Talk or Toby Mac. This video features dc Talk members Michael and Toby talking about their friendship. It spoke volumes to me about our youth council and that there’s hope.

The video is kinda long at 10 minutes so if you don’t want to watch it, the best part is the last minute or two of Toby talking.

P.S. Kevin and Toby are still HOT!

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Protected: The drama over?

October 15th, 2007 at 9:17 am / Amy Bennett / Enter your password to view comments.

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Looking for a little peace?

September 30th, 2007 at 9:52 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

Last night Scott and I had to get ready for Sunday School and youth bible study tonight. I normally teach Sunday School but was really tired last night and not up to studying. I asked Scott to do Sunday School and he said sure as long as I did the bible study. No other leaders were going to be there so it was up to us. Fine, that gave me another afternoon to prepare. Lately we’ve been using the Youth Link song sermons. I stopped by the youth room this morning to look through the book and pick a CD to take home. I mentioned hearing the song East to West last week on the way home and was pleasantly surprised to see this song as one of my options. I barely looked to see how the lesson was laid out and took it home. Honestly, I didn’t think the lesson did justice to the song and taking what’s been on my heart lately and tying in what our speaker from Wednesday spoke about, I came up with my own thing. I’d like to share it but it’s going to be long…it took about 45 minutes to get through. So if you’re up for it…read on.

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You want me to sing what?

September 25th, 2007 at 11:18 pm / Amy Bennett / 2 Comments »

So my neighbor/lead guitarist in our worship band at church gets in my car on the way to practice and says, "We need to have a band meeting." Apparently, he got pretty frustrated last week between band practice being as insane and disorganized as it was and not being able to hear himself play on Wednesday night and really frustrated with the other guitarist I’ve been mentioning as being, uh, high maintenance.

So me being the adult, I had to sit everyone down and lead a meeting. We made it clear that I was the lead singer and we’d be singing songs in my key as much as possible. And that our rhythm guitarist would concentrate on his guitar stuff and provide vocals whenever possible but his first priority should be to play.

Also, we talked about direction. Which songs we should learn and such. I gave them a great pep talk about this band is only as good as the work they put into it. And I was just along for the ride and I’d help organize and sing when none of the youth members showed. And somehow in all that I agreed to learn U2′s "40". It’s a song that is written from Psalm 40. And I’m cool with the song but they want me to sing the same song Bono sang? Oh my, I’m really way out of my league here. And seeing we have yet to have one youth member attend a band practice, I’m guessing it’s pretty much up to me.

But they were excited about it. Apparently S kept saying they’d learn it but he left before they had a chance.

I do have to say band practice went amazingly smooth. We even got out 30 minutes early. We got through all 4 songs and even some of them a few times. And that’s even after having the meeting. It’s amazing what a little communication will do for you.

So, I just found that the "40" mp3 in a stash of music S gave me at one time and I suppose that’s what I’ll be listening to for the next week. Here’s hoping I don’t make a complete fool out of myself (well, that’s maybe a given) and rip a U2 song to shreds.

Technorati Tags: youth group , band , U2 , 40

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Not too bad

September 19th, 2007 at 11:46 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

OK I reported yesterday’s band practice was not too good but tonight turned out not too bad. I recruited a young but extremely talented female youth member to sing with us and she picked up on our new song the second time through! We’ve said from the get-go she would be great but she is a bit immature at times and says she gets nervous standing in front of everyone. Although she does solos in “big church” and in fact has this week’s choir solo so I’m not sure how much that is her needing reassurance from us or what but I’ll give her all she needs because she seriously could lead this. And she’s only in 8th grade so if needed, she could do it for several years to come. I all but begged her to come next Tuesday and plan to send her parents emails saying she did great and maybe even a note to her telling her how good she was. And yes, I’m kissing some major backside because we need her.

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Not too good

September 19th, 2007 at 2:57 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

Band practice yesterday was the worst so far. We wanted to do four songs. We never did get through playing the first one after an HOUR. They were moving some sound board things around and it took forever to really get started. And I had to leave to go to the hospital so I think it put everyone in a tizzy trying to get it all done fast but not really doing anything productive. The second (new) song went well. We only went through it twice though. And then the 3rd one we skipped because I felt like everyone knew it enough. And the 4th, it is a song 2 of the guitarist had never played and they weren’t picking it up that quickly and the key was wrong for me and there was no time to switch keys when they didn’t even have the first one down. So I just said we’re only doing 3 tomorrow. So it could be a real mess tonight. The “backup” singing-guitarist didn’t help sing at all because he hadn’t practiced any songs through the week and couldn’t play and sing at the same time so it was even harder for me.

I’m planning on getting some youth up on the 2 songs we already know and only really leading on the new one we’re introducing tonight. I’m really second-guessing this singing thing. I’ve heard comments that some students want to sing, so I think I’m just going to go with that. I’ve realized I haven’t really been having fun doing it. It’s nothing but stress thinking about having to go to sing at practice and on Wednesday nights.

I really wish there was a student that could really step up and lead. Even if I had to go to the practices and help sing/lead the practice, I’d be fine with that. I don’t mind the practices themselves. It’s just I’m tired of embarrassing myself when I can’t find the right key on a song when I’m singing alone.

Hopefully tonight will turn out ok and they’ll by psyched about the new song.

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Entertaining angels

September 12th, 2007 at 11:30 pm / Amy Bennett / 2 Comments »

Tonight Scott taught the lesson at youth. He told a (true) story a preacher once told him. It was regarding the verse:

Hebrews 13:2 2 Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.

This preacher was walking along in town and saw a man he did not know around town (the same town I live in now which 20 years ago was very small). He was dressed like a homeless man and stopped the preacher to ask for $1 to get something to eat. The preacher waved him off saying he didn’t have time. About four steps past the man, he realized what he had done and that he shouldn’t have acted that way. He turned around to give him the dollar and the man was gone. He said there was nowhere he could have gotten that quickly, nowhere to hide anywhere around him. He insists to this day it was an angel sent to test how he would react.

There were two instances just this week where I felt led to give two people money or at least offer help and I didn’t. One was in the grocery store. A man was buying some very cheap meals in front of us and he gave the cashier all change and then was scrounging for the rest. I almost offered to pay the rest as I had a $10 bill right in front of me. He ended up producing some $20s out of his pocket so I didn’t say anything but still, I still felt like I should have offered. Those $20s may have been rent or mortgage money.

The second was of a man walkin on an Interstate ramp near my house. He had a hiking backpack on, was young and didn’t look homeless exactly but seemed on a trip in some way. He wasn’t really going anywhere and even after my van passed him and no cars were behind him, he didn’t attempt to cross the road on the ramp and wasn’t really going anywhere. Scott and the girls were with me and it wasn’t really feasible to take him anywhere but I still felt led to stop and ask if we needed to call someone or even if he needed money. And yet, I kept driving.

Opportunities missed that I’ll never get back and probably have to answer for in heaven. It saddens and disappoints me that I can’t listen to His voice even in the simplest of things.

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Band practice

September 11th, 2007 at 9:28 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

So band practice today…we actually learned a new song together! Yay! It went way smoother than I thought although it’s not nearly perfect. I’m still no singer and one of the guitarist is having an issue with the transition from the verse to the chorus but hey. We can get through it without stopping.

Had an interesting conversation with one of the guitarist though. There are 3 guitarist. One is basically the leader and was heavily involved in the youth group. One is my neighbor and went to camp with us this year but is heavily into being in the band and is a serious musician. The third is not so much part of the youth group, just a guy playing in our band. Well apparently he can be hard to get along with sometimes, trying to play too much rock and also trying to dominate everything. Well the other week I asked him to sing with me to help me figure out when to come in until I learned. He graciously agreed. But then last week when I had a couple key changes he mentioned it may be too high for him and also that he’d figure it out. Fine. Well tonight he says, “We’re going to have to figure out something about these keys, they are too high for me to sing.” I wanted to say, well, I’m sorry, the other keys are too low for me to sing so if you want me in this band, we need to sing them in this key. But what I said was, “Well, you and I are like me and St, we can’t sing the same key so if you can sing either the chorus or the verse, just come in then.” Trying to say just sing when you can basically. He says, “Well, I don’t want to be a backup singer. I only can sing when I project.” So I say, “Well, I don’t want you to be backup. I want you to project when you sing.” So I say, “Let’s just leave it like this for now since we’ve been practicing it like this and if you figure out something, we can talk about it next week.” So I’ve been invited to sing in the band but yet I’m not supposed to sing. And he is still playing guitar when he sings. It’s not like I can just stop singing and just play. I would just be standing there. He could play when he’s not singing. So why tell me “this is not working”. What does he want me to do? Just quit?

I took my neighbor home and he complained about him almost the whole way home. The bad part is the guy really does help me when he sings. I guess I’ll just ignore him for now and say something a little bit more forceful if it comes up again.

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Voice Lessons

August 31st, 2007 at 11:18 pm / Amy Bennett / 2 Comments »

That’s the simplest way to put St and my meeting today. We basically went through about 10 songs we sing and took time on each one to figure out my key. It seems to range from C-G. Most of the ones he sang were in A, mostly too high for me. Which now makes perfect sense.

So now I have to relearn all these songs and practice, practice, practice.

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That wasn’t half bad

August 29th, 2007 at 10:07 pm / Amy Bennett / No Comments »

OK, so youth band tonight wasn’t half bad. I KNOW I was off-pitch but I knew where we were in the songs and I knew where to come 99% of the time. That is HUGE. Wanna know what helped? One of the guitarist that was not there at practice yesterday got on the stage with a mic and sang with me. He’s not a great singer either but because he’s playing, he knows EXACTLY when to come in. Now with him giving me more confidence in the timing, I feel more open to singing louder. And not saying it was great, but it was a vast improvement. AND turns out he has a keyboard so he’s going to bring it next week and I think one of our other leaders that plays keyboard on Sunday morning is going to give it a whirl (don’t worry, Jaynee, I’ve still got you on MY LIST and will let you know how it goes). As much as I’ve whined and complained this week, tonight I’m pumped because I see hope!

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Ugh, the singing

August 29th, 2007 at 10:38 am / Amy Bennett / 3 Comments »

OK, so only the lead and bass guitarist and myself showed up for practice. It was enough that we could actually run through the songs and me to learn the intros and transitions and such. But. I sounded even worse with absolutely no one else to sing with and no keyboard for me to hear the melody.

It sucked.

They said I needed to sing louder and that it sounded “boring”. I kept trying to explain part of the problem was the song was quite redundant and I was trying to sing notes that were way too low for me and I knew we needed to change keys but I don’t know enough about my singing to know and they aren’t experienced enough yet to know either.

I was straight up with them saying I know right now I can’t lead this music but I’m willing to sing crappy just so someone is at least leading the group. They were insistent they wanted me to sing with them. As for other singers, they seemed game for getting a “praise team” of several youth to also sing. But trying to get random people to commit is hard. And if this is going to work, they HAVE to be at practice.

Last evening I went over to St’s new church and listened to them practice hoping to glean some insight on how to run practice with a band. They actually are doing some songs we are. But I’m not sure if the practice served anything except to show awesomely excellent they are and how horrible I’m doing.

I talked to St after he got out for about an hour. We realized I have a few problems. For one thing, I’m trying to lead songs with a male lead line. He has a high male voice so when I go to sing the songs the band is used to, I’m either way too high, or way too low. And obviously during practice yestrday, I was singing way too low. Another problem is I’m used to singing in the choir and I can either hear the melody with the track, piano or other sopranos singing. With the band (no keyboardist right now), I have nothing. No point of reference.

I have to know how to sing it.

Period.

And I don’t.

I’m no soloist, have never been.

And here I’m trying to lead a band. But honestly, part of me feels like I’m supposed to be doing this. St has agreed to meet with me Friday and help me figure out what keys I should be singing in and we’re going to have a keyboard there. And he’s going to show me all the resources online for the lead sheets, transposing, etc.

He also ensured me I CAN sing. I’ve stood directly in front of him for two years as he’s lead our choir and he knows I can sing. And St is picky. I know he’d tell me if I couldn’t. So I know I can do this.

My last problem is I’m just scared out of my mind and I have to let loose and just let it go. Get over myself and do it.

So for now I’m hanging in there. I want to learn how to sing and how to do it my way, not St’s way. I want to be the singer the band needs because those kids are talented and I don’t want to see it go to waste.

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Crap.

August 28th, 2007 at 2:27 pm / Amy Bennett / 2 Comments »

I can’t sing.

I thought I could sing a little bit, but no.

I can’t sing.

Before I went to a two hour practice tonight with the band, I recorded myself and listened to it to make sure I wasn’t going to make a complete fool out of myself tonight or at youth tomorrow.

And guess what??

I AM GOING TO MAKE A COMPLETE FOOL OF MYSELF.

It’s bad. Really bad. Like American Idol reject, show it in the first few episodes of the season bad.

What am I going to do?? I have practice in less than two hours now and am expected to sing. I’m so depressed. Why have people let me sing in the choir for the past 10 years?!? I even asked Scott and he said with a smirk and a little laugh, it’s ok. AHH!! Why are you letting your wife get in front of 50 people and siiinnngg?!

Let me tell you, this is going to give a whole new meaning to the phrase “Jesus Freak”. Lord, help us all. Seriously.

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Amy’s a rocker–haha, I’m laughing too

August 22nd, 2007 at 11:01 pm / Amy Bennett / 3 Comments »

I got the black hair last night and then I sang in our youth band tonight. Neither are related but someone did make a comment that I looked more rocker-ish now…let’s hope it’s less Ozzy-ish and more Kat Von Dish. I should have painted my nails black and put on red lipstick.

Anyway, the entire afternoon and evening was spent at church. The guys in the band asked if I would sing with the band two weeks ago. I sort of ignored them, sure they were joking with the old-lady youth leader, and then they asked again last week if I would come to practice. I wasn’t sure if any other youth had volunteered which is the optimal choice but I didn’t want to leave them hanging tonight. And hey, I DO like singing and usually manage to hit a few good notes when I sing. Although before tonight I had never held a microphone to sing and have only sung as part of school and church choirs starting in middle school.

At first, I was having a really hard time singing. I wasn’t belting it and the other guy that had ended up showing didn’t really know how to lead either. We sounded like two 8 year olds singing to a cassette tape in their bedroom.

Yeah, that good.

And then a girl got up with us and while she was good at timing, I don’t think she hit one note, bless her heart. The other youth dragged her away from the stage and the guy singing with me’s girlfriend got up and sang with me. She used to sing with St when he was there but she hadn’t been at practice in a long time. After she got up, I did much better. She was familiar with singing with the band on those songs, so she knew when to come in more than we did..which wasn’t hard.

Practice was generally horrible though. We had a hard time knowing when to come in as all we had was chord sheets to follow and none of us stayed on tune the whole time. But once youth group started and we did the 4 song set and we did purdy darn good. It was far from perfect. We ended songs in mid-sentence as the players weren’t sure whether to do the bridge one more time and all of us were not singing in tune the whole time and one song we missed almost a whole verse.

It wasn’t pretty.

But we tried and with the whole youth group singing, no one hardly noticed. It’s sort of a joke in our youth group that no one can keep time and no one can stay on tune so there’s no high expectations, they just need someone to lead.

So anyway, I’m going to go next week to practice hopefully with the other two youth singers and we’ll be a lot better.

And to be honest, I sort of dig the whole being on stage singing thing. But shh, don’t tell anyone.